So, in recent discussion with other players, I was both stunned and shocked to discover that my statue collection is not unique. I thought that I was the only player who was stockpiling statues far in excess of the wildest dreams of the White Witch in Narnia! However, it seems that there are other claimants to the title of statue hoarder besides myself.
The recent wild and hectic scramble of an Event has sparked my imagination and I must give credit where credit is due. I could never have envisioned something as grand as what I'm about to lay out without such lofty inspiration. I realize that this may all be programmatically impossible given that I understand Margaret Hamilton is no longer actively working in AGC, but perhaps there may be others of such genius in the world as to not feel this to be an insurmountable task? And if it works, I can only say that I saw far because I stood on the shoulders of giants. I did brush my shoes off, though. It is not healthy to be rude to giants.
So, what if players could take statues in their star menu and convert those statues into resources? I know this is a reach, but I have heard that they used to convert marble into statues in Greece, back before they just converted everything into debt, which I understand is a much more modern and efficient form of art. So maybe it could be done the other way, too? Could you convert statues into marble? Or even other minerals? My research indicates yes.
While I do not posses any actual real statues at home, I do own a silicone mold which enables me to convert regular tap water into a solid item shaped like the Death Star - overnight. If I pull it out of the freezer at like 11PM, the center is still liquid and I'm not sure exactly when the conversion becomes complete because my wife yells at me for eating all the ice cream if I check it too often but I suspect it occurs on the stroke of midnight or perhaps the crack of dawn. We all know that these are specially powerful alignments of numbers and burning things.
Over the course of several tests I learned that if I launch the Death Star (solid, no longer liquid - converted by the magic of GE) with sufficient velocity at the specially consecrated sacrificial concrete block in my yard, it shatters into a bazillion pieces, just like Alderaan. And that my shoulder starts hurting.
Switching to a hammer yields interesting results. Wear safety glasses, cause if smashing statues is anything like smashing the Death Star you could blind yourself. But on the positive side of things, you can make blocks by smashing stuff carefully. And I bet that this would work with statues just the same as "that's not a moon; it's a battle station!" If I had a chisel, I'd convey those results as well. For that matter, if there is enough interest I could start an Indiegogo or Gofundme or maybe just get a cup to put change in and we could crowdfund this research. All the labor would be mine, so you know I'd be vested, yo.
I understand that if we're going to change how resources are deployed in the Settlers World, there has to be an Event. And statues are an important resource. And they're being hoarded. By everyone. And if all those statues were to be brought into play at once, that could cause a disturbance in the Force... No. It could make Baby Jesus cry. Wait, not that either. It would Disrupt the Economy. (I knew I'd remember the correct religion eventually.)
In order to protect the Economy we should get rid of the statues. And since everyone really values their statues a lot, players should be compensated for them. And once the statues are gone and everyone is rich we could all buy stuff with our compensation materials and the Economy will be fine.
So, what we need, programming-wise is this:
- A new menu tab for each statue type.
- Shop additions to buy statues (for those who are short of statues and don't want to be left out) on each tab.
- Different hammer types to deal with each statue type that will yield marble, granite, or stone from a statue.
- Three different chisel types that match, but are not included with the hammers. They'll all do the same thing, but in different amounts.
- A 'Keep out, Noobs!' menu popup for each new statue menu that will go away with the usage of 5000 gems.
- New tabs for the Provision House and Rarity Provision House so that players can use the appropriate statue, hammer, and chisel to make a block of marble, granite, or stone, depending on which hammer and chisel combo is used on which statue.
- A big 'clicky button' icon that runs a 38(ish) second timer on it that must be activated repeatedly with the hammer, chisel, and statue resources to create the aforementioned blocks.
- Maybe a big rainbow graphic that will launch when a statue finally breaks into blocks. If it can run in Shockwave and obscure the player's entire screen and have an accompanying tinkling noise, that would be fantastic.
- And maybe a few unicorns. Not sure exactly what to do with them but, c'mon. Unicorns. You know you want em. Unicorn parade, anyone?
There we go. A unicorn parade to open the event.
So, can we do this? I mean, it's an Event. And it does stuff. And uses things.
